Sunday, September 26, 2010

Short Film Treatment- Romantic Comedy/Magical Realism

Logline: A girl stays home to do all the chores for her family every weekend, while everyone else just sits around or goes out; they are not thankful for what she does and she tells them how she feels taken for granted.

Opens to a girl separated from her family; all of them are sitting down on the couch eating dinner and watching tv together while she is cleaning the kitchen. Once they are done with dinner; they all just put their plates on the counter and go to bed. She is once again left to clean the mess.

The next day she goes up to her parents and ask if she can go out with a couple of friends tomorrow. Her parents say no because she has to clean up the backyard and garage because her 4 other siblings are going out with their parents to an amusement park that day. She finishes cleaning early and asks if she can go with them and her parents denied her again and made her clean their room.

When they get home she asks how it was and they all just ignored her. She went to her room and started to cry. She started to think to herself why her family does not want to be around her or appreciate what she does for them so she went back to the living room and started yelling at them saying she does all the work around the house and is tired of coming last. Her parents tell her to go to her room and never yell at them again. She goes to her room like her parents said and cry herself to sleep.

The nest day is her birthday. She walks downstairs and the kitchen is a mess from breakfast. There is nothing but scraps left and no one is home but her. She is sad but cleans the mess and gets ready to go eat lunch by herself. Her car is an old, beat up car that stalls when she starts it and the paint is coming off. She then goes shopping by herself and when she gets home her family is just sitting at home watching tv. They then ask her if she could go get dinner, she is upset but does what they ask. When she walks in the house is clean and decorated filled with her friends and family. Her parents thought she deserved a surprise party for everything she did and even got her a new car and new tv for her room.

After the party is over her family cleans the mess while she watches tv in her room. Her family apologizes for how they have been acting in the past and that they will all share the responsibility of cleaning.

2 comments:

  1. You have a good idea, but you need to flesh it out more to get a more entertaining experience. The plot is good, but offers no adventure to the reader. The only thing I really felt was just wanting to yell at the family too. Maybe you could splice a bit of Amelie mischief there in order to give the family their just desserts. You could turn this into something watchable, but give it that Amelie hook that will bring viewers into the audience.

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  2. pretty good treatment. i think it would be a lot cleaner if you could make everything happen in the same day rather than over the period of three days. it's only a 3 minute film.

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